💔《A Woman's Friendship Is Very Fragile: One Day, Besties Can Also Become the Most Familiar Strangers》
Intro｜It's not that I have no friends, but that I no longer want to wrong myself to maintain a relationship
A woman's friendship can sometimes be truly strange. We used to chat together, eat together, share secrets, and even treat each other like family; yet one day, the relationship suddenly changed. Former closeness turned into comparison, concern into interference, advice into pressure, and eventually besties became people we no longer wished to see. (｡•́︿•̀｡)💔
I am now slowly accepting one thing: having no friends is normal.
Because I was never someone with a good temper. My personality is very direct, I get fierce when angry, and sometimes I can really be unbearable. I admit this part and am willing to reflect on it. However, if a friendship requires me to constantly suppress myself, please others, and prove my worth just to earn the right to stay, then I would rather not have it.
Content｜I once thought that was called friendship
In the past, I truly treated some people as sisters.
I gave face, gave reputation, helped out, and even swallowed my temper when I felt unwell. Gifts, intentions, blessings—as long as I felt the other person deserved it, I was almost always willing to do it thoroughly. (´•̥̥̥ω•̥̥̥`)🎁
But later I discovered that giving does not mean it will be cherished.
Being good to someone does not mean they will be good to you in return.
Sometimes, the harder you try to maintain the relationship, the more likely you are to become humble.
The most ridiculous part is that when you once treated them as family, you later find that your values are fundamentally different—that gap is truly huge.
I used to think: "She should understand me."
It later became: "It turns out you never truly understood me."
(￣▽￣;)💭
I even began to doubt whether those so-called "suggestions" were meant to help me become better, or to prevent me from becoming better than them.
But now, I no longer want to guess.
Because I can never control other people's motives; yet whether I continue to get close is something I can decide.
I also no longer want to blame others for all problems.
I know I have flaws.
I get angry, jealous, stubborn, impulsive, and can say hurtful words when wounded. These are all lessons I need to face.
But I also do not need to accept repeated harm from others just because I am imperfect.
A truly mature friendship should not be about "who is prettier, who is more popular, who is more liked."
Nor should it be:
"You cannot be better than me."
"You cannot be too confident."
"You cannot steal my spotlight."
If seeing another woman become prettier, more capable, or more successful first triggers comparison, jealousy, or suppression instead of happiness, that is truly exhausting. (´；ω；｀)🌧️
I now understand that the easiest place for a woman to lose herself is by caring too much about what other women think of her.
So I no longer want to play this game.
No more following, no more pleasing, no more forced chats, no more repeated explanations, and no more expecting those who have walked away to suddenly turn back and say, "We really cherished you before."
No need.
Truly no need.
Because so much time has already passed.
Without you all, I am fine.
Life continues, breakfast still needs to be eaten, work still needs to be found, photos still need to be taken, content still needs to be created, and there are still many things waiting for me to accomplish in life. 📷🌷✨
Before, I might have thought: "Does losing besties mean I am a failure?"
Now I think instead:
Being able to leave a relationship that does not suit me is also a form of growth.
I do not need to prove who was wrong or who won, nor do I need to curse anyone into unhappiness.
You live your life, I live mine.
I can acknowledge that the past friendship existed; I can also acknowledge that the past hurt truly pained me.
But I do not have to live forever in those memories.
🌿 True letting go is not forgiving everyone, but no longer allowing those people to continue deciding your emotions.
So if one day someone asks me:
"Do you still want to contact your old besties?"
My answer will be simple:
No.
Not because I hate you, but because I finally know that life does not require filling it with many friends to be happy.
Sometimes, living quietly alone, taking care of yourself, cherishing family, working hard to earn money, and living your life well feels far more comfortable than constantly guessing others' moods. (｡･ω･｡)ﾉ♡✨
A woman's friendship is indeed very fragile.
But I now believe more—
A relationship truly worth keeping does not require you to constantly wrong yourself to maintain it.
If a friendship can only be built on comparison, control, exploitation, showing off, and pleasing, then leaving it may not be loneliness, but freedom.
Starting today, I no longer treat "having no friends" as a flaw.
I am simply reclaiming my life for myself. 🌙🪷
🪷 Buddhist Reflections
"When affinity arrives, cherish it; when it ends, let it go with the flow. Letting go is not loss, but allowing your heart to regain freedom."
#WomansFriendshipIsFragile #Besties #InterpersonalRelationships #LettingGoOfAttachments #NoguchiKonomi